Child: When are we safe?
Mother: Here and now. In my arms.
Child: But your arms are soft and warm. They can’t stop monsters.
Mother: No. They can’t.
Child: So when are we safe?
Mother: Here and now. In my arms.
Child: You already said that. So, we’re never safe.
Mother: We’re together.
Child: Not all the time. Besides, that doesn’t mean we’re safe.
Mother: But I’m here now to protect you.
Child: Well how can you protect me when you’re not around?
Mother: I’ll stop the monsters now so you won’t ever have to worry about them ever again.
Child: But you’ll die if you do that.
Mother: I only want to keep you safe.
Child: I’ll be alone.
Mother: You’ll never be alone.
Child: You know, you really are starting to annoy me.
Mother: Why do you say that?
Child: Well, first of all, you come off as kind of weird every night with this ‘I’m-the-mom-everything-is-okay’ stuff that goes on and on, over and over. But it doesn’t really help me.
Mother: So you’re saying I annoy you.
Child: Yeah. Kind of. I mean if you stop to think about what you’re saying to me, it’s pretty meaningless. I’m telling you about the blood-sucking monsters that are outside my bedroom window, and you’re going on about this ‘here-and-now’ crap.
Mother: Child!
Child: And the stuff about being in your arms. Do you know how sweaty I get when you hug up on me? It makes my head itch, too.
Mother: Well then, if you find me annoying and don’t like my hugs, then you can deal with the monsters yourself.
Child: Mom? Oh come on, Babe. You don’t have to leave now. Mom?
Child: Mom?
Monster: Hey kid.
Child: Which one are you?
Monster: The choker.
Child: No. Not you. Aw, I hate it when you show up.
Monster: Hey, at least I’m not the bloodsucker. Besides, you haven’t been choked in a while. A good choking is just the thing for you.
Child: Yeah, but it hurts.
Monster: Not if I kill you. Then you won’t feel a thing.
Child: Dammit. Do you really have to choke me tonight?
Monster: I’m afraid so. Don’t struggle.
Child: MOM!
Monster: shhhh….
Child: MOM! The choking monster is in here! He’s going to choke me, Mom!
Monster: Just relax, kid.
Child: MO-gurgh–
Monster: That’s it. Turning blue. Turning blue. Baal loves you. Turning blue.
Child: gggrrruuuggghh
Monster: Turning blue. Turning-
Mother: That’s enough of that.
Monster: OW!
Child: Uu…uh. Mom… Mommy.
Mother: Honestly, you have way too many fathers that love to torment you.
Child: Mommy?
Monster: Did you really have to kick me in the nuts, Hon? I mean, geez, I have a job to do.
Mother: Et daemonium exisse.
Monster: Oh, you rotten strumpet. I hate you, you bi–
Child: It’s gone?
Mother: He’s gone.
Child: Mommy?
Mother: What?
Child: When are we safe?
Mother: Shut up and go to sleep.
©Jack Lee Taylor 2016